Today I woke up and feel nearly normal. I can't tell you what a relief that is. Of course, being here at work and being on my feet, carrying around my laptop and my belly and back are achy again. What feels best is my attitude. I feel like it's getting back to normal. I realized last night that it's time to stop eating like I'm a sick person. I'm feeling better and I've got to begin moving on.
Yesterday my eating was great. I had cheerios for breakfast and coffee, of course. I had a great lunch. I ate peaches, 1/2 cup green peas, a few canned pears and a cup of light progresso Chicken and Dumpling soup. It was 400 calories which is more than I generally eat at lunch, but I was hungry for some fruit. I had a couple of plums on my way to my son's football game. Then for dinner I had 3oz of pork chop, grilled and green beans and 1/2 cup of risotto my Nanny made for me. She still is trying to feed me well. It's an Italian thing. The day was done at 1175 calories. I'm still getting used to getting all my water back in. I drank at least 64oz and today I'll do more.
As I lay in bed last night with my stomach rolling from it's first meat in quite a while, I wanted the security of my gold fish crackers. I wasn't hungry, but my tummy was rumbly and I'd gotten in the habit of munching crackers when my tummy felt bad. But, that was before I could eat real food. I told my brain, NO more. And that was it. I laid there and watched Caprica and then to sleep for me. I slept well despite weird dreams and my belly hurting through the night. I still have pain when I lay a certain way from the surgery.
I woke up this morning and weighed in. I wasn't going to and then the bitch in my brain said, "Weigh or Don't weigh. Doesn't change how much you weigh, does it? Gotta start again sometime and get back on your schedule." OK then. How true. Whether or not I weigh and see the scale, I weigh what I weigh. Accept it and do something about it. So, I did. I weighed 212.4. Down a pound. Still up 3# from my lowest pre-surgery weight. I was soooo excited when I saw those 2 Ohs, this is still a little depressing. But, alas. I can do nothing but move forward and I'm determined to see those numbers again soon. Whining about how I gained will not burn the calories I need to see them again, now will they?
For the first time I feel like I'm ready to exercise. I might just go home and try a ride on the stationary. It's my go to when I don't feel great. And now that I've said I would to all of you, I must. Accountability people. It's what we're here for.
I wanted to mention a couple of bloggers. Maybe you know them, but if not check them out. First, Tami, over at Nutmeg Notebook. She is so supportive and has the best recipes over there. She takes great pics and is enjoyable to read. I spend most of my time jealous of her cooking, but at least I know if I have time to cook, I'll have a tasty and healthy recipe to do it with.
Next, I read a great post on helping your kids learn to eat healthy by Lanie over at Healthy Schmealthy today. It is such an important topic for anyone who has kids or is around them or plans to have them. It is up to all of us to make sure that our kids don't end up sharing our struggles with weight and health. I watched only a few minutes of Biggest Loser last night which I don't usually watch. Bob was talking to one of the contestants. A single mom of 2 who said she can order a $5 pizza and it feeds all 3 of them. He said he understood how hard it was but that, "Your kids are worth more than a $5 pizza." How true and important for each of us to remember.
And finally, MaryFran at A New Start: Losing weight posted about gaining back a lot of weight and hating herself for it. We've all been there. We all know it's more about the mental challenge of this process than the physical. Go on over and lend some support today. One day at a time is all we have people.
Now that I can check:" post on blog" off my TO DO, I'm off to finish other work. Have a great day everyone!