Today I woke up late. I over slept. My husband is out of town and my routine is totally screwed up. My ankle is so much better. Only a little soreness if I turn it a certain way. My legs aren't as sore and things are much better.
I missed TKD today because the office was swamped and I didn't make it there. So I didn't get my workout as planned. But, I really think that was good because now I feel much better and I can resume running for sure in the morning.
Food today was good. I still haven't had any appetite . I think I'm just too busy. I don't know as it is foreign to me. I'm just not used to not caring whether I eat or not. I ate a little over 1000cals today and that's all I wanted.
I wish I had something inspiring to say today, but all I can say is not every day is amazing. Some days are just days. The key to all this is being consistent. Day after day after day. Eating right and keeping up with the water. Moving more everyday.
More and more people are noticing my weight loss. This is so wonderful, but a mixed bag. I'm just not used to the attention it brings. I am flattered by the compliments and they don't bother me as much. But, the whole, "what are you doing" conversation and all the unwanted advice. If I'm the one losing weight, why are people trying to tell me how to lose weight?
My clothes are frustrating me right now. Most of them are too big. Yeah! Not complaining, but it does mean that getting dressed takes longer than it used to. I have more choices and some of the things I still feel like should fit ok, don't. I think I'm between sizes as some things I've bought in smaller sizes are just not quite comfortable yet. I spend time trying things on and tossing them in the donate pile. The other day I came home and pulled off the shirt I had worn and tossed it straight in. Somebody's gonna be happy to get my old clothes. I noticed today that the size 14 pants from Lane Bryant are too big. I got a couple of pairs of jeans in the "normal" section in size 14. They fit great.
I was reading Allan's blog today and he mentioned how he's trying to adjust to smaller clothes and the larger ones are more comfortable. I know what he means. I have a couple of sweatshirts and other clothes that I continue to wear despite how big they are. My scrubs for one. I'm still wearing 2X. But, I ordered new ones this week. It is just strange to think about clothes that aren't baggy. When I was bigger I've always felt weird if clothes felt too tight. My rolls would show, my muffin top, my cellulite. Having clothes that touch my body is weird.
OH! And it's official. The girls have shrunk. I'm down a whole cup size. I realized that it seems like over night my bras were way too big. They were loose and like spinning almost when I move. I mean it was literally over night it seems like. One day they fit and the next, too big. Luckily I had bought a couple on clearance in anticipation. I tried them and they fit. Also, the wonderful sports bras I've been using are too big. Great. Those things are not cheap. I did get a new one the other day on sale at the running store. This makes me wonder what size I'll be at goal. Weird. I've always had big boobs.
I've always wished for smaller ones. It was just another reason to be different. I was wearing a bra in 5th grade and I remember the boys snapping my bra all the time and laughing. It was great fodder for the humiliation machine. As I got older, I realized they weren't such a bad thing to have. That negative attention from boys in 5th grade was very different by college.
The guys won't understand, but the quest for the perfect bra, the holy grail of womanhood, is an ongoing thing for all of us, no matter the size. It is especially important now in my 40s and with all the running and Tae Kwon Do, it is absolutely essential. I found a couple of excellent ones, but they are so expensive and if my size is gong to change more, this could get to be a drag. OH well. At least I'm shrinking and not getting bigger!
Anyway, adjusting to my new size seems to be a daily thing. I guess while I'm transforming that's how it will be. I was driving today when something caught my eye. I looked down and ......there was a triceps. Woo hoo. I do have one. Starting to see more definition, but also more hanging skin. I don't care, The scale is moving and so am I. That's what I'm after.
This blog is an accounting of my personal journey to find fitness. All the content on this blog should be read as a biographical piece of literature, not a medical resource. I am a physician, but I am in no way giving medical advice or establishing doctor patient relationships with my readers. I am simply keeping a diary. If you are starting a diet or exercise program or require medical evaluation or advice, please see your own family physician.