MIA? No just IA!

Sorry for the no posting. I am so freaking busy and overwhelmed lately. I'm sure you are tired of hearing that from me. I am totally surprised that it's been 13 days since I last posted. Sigh...I will try and recap and update you on what's been up.

Since last I wrote I've had an emotional time with my cousin's birthday and the first year since he died. I'm still struggling with his death and I feel so silly even typing that a year later, but it's just plain true. His birthday would have been the 18th and that weekend was rough. He would of been 41. I had a binge. I know it didn't help anything that we had a block party that night. There was a lot of food and temptation. I did all the right things-planned ahead, took something healthy, had a healthy snack before I went.  When I got there I felt like I was pretending to be happy, I felt guilty for being happy and then I made the mistake of having a margarita. There's nothing wrong with an occasional drink. I do it now and then, but bad timing for me with my guard down and already vulnerable and before I knew it I had 2 drinks and 3 cookies. This led to guilt the morning after and more sadness which led to more bad choices. I know what went wrong. I've worked through a lot of the issues.  I'm learning and it was the first binge in a long time. I'm moving forward.

Last week was busy, but better. I've been working out a lot as I move toward my brown belt test which is Saturday. Yikes! Last week I worked out every day, except Sunday when I rested. I've been eating well considering I have my in-laws visiting and I've been cooking for them and entertaining. They'll be here through this weekend. The holiday weekend was great. I cooked 10 pounds of beans or the annual boy scout BBQ. That's a LOT of beans. We fed about 1000 people. It was HOT. After we went home and hit the pool. Overall I'm happy with the way I've done on my diet. With all the distractions, I've done well.

Yesterday I went to 2 TKD classes. I burned over 1500 calories in exercise. I was STARVED last night at dinner. I had a huge salad, a small steak and veggies. I had watermelon for dessert. All week we have end of year activities with the kids. Yesterday was my baby's kindergarten graduation. Today was my 2nd grader and tomorrow is my 8th grader's graduation. Sniff sniff. Mommy's so proud and sad but I'm too busy to think a whole lot about it.

Saturday is my brown belt test. It will likely last about 4-5hours. I'll be on the move for most of that time. I really feel ready. I know the material. I'm just a little worried about my left knee that I tweaked while gardening. Oh yeah.....the garden is coming in and we have some great tomatoes and cucumbers coming up. So anyway, I figure I just have to demonstrate the material. I know the sparring will be hard and suck and I'll likely get beat up, but I'm ok with it. I don't have to win a match, just survive it. I also have to break a board with my hand this time and one with a kick. Should be fun.

Speaking of fun, I ordered the P90X. I'm looking forward to starting it, but I'm going to wait until after my vacation so I don't have to interrupt the program. Until then, I'm training for TKD, seeing my trainer and the usual workouts. I'm up to 30 push ups which I think is fabulous considering I couldn't do 5 when I started. Yesterday we did 150 crunches in the first class and 90 in the other. I did 30 push ups in the first class and 15 in the other. My arms were burning. This morning I was only a little stiff in the hamstring and I stretched it out. I feel better. I didn't get my workout at lunch because of work and it pissed me off. Tonight I'll practice TKD and stretch at least. Tomorrow I'll do at least one class and 2 if I can. I'm actually in pretty good shape for a fat chick.

This weekend we tried something new on the grill- pineapple. I just cut off the skin, rubbed a little cinnamon and brown sugar and slapped it on there. OMG what an AWESOME dessert. It was sooo good and the kids LOVED it.

We have a leak in our roof, but we're not sure where. The last 2 nights we've had storms and we have had water coming in around our ceiling fan in the bedroom. We can't figure out how the water is getting in. It's annoying and I haven't slept very well the last several nights.

Oh yeah. Did I mention my in-laws are here? So I'm tired and I'm rambling and that's about it for now. I really want to get back to more regular posts. I feel like I'm the hamster on the wheel and the wheel just goes faster and faster!

I've been reading and catching up on all your blogs today. Stay the course and move my friends. I'll let you know how the rest of the week and the test goes. I'm so nervous!