This blog is an accounting of my personal journey to find fitness. All the content on this blog should be read as a biographical piece of literature, not a medical resource. I am a physician, but I am in no way giving medical advice or establishing doctor patient relationships with my readers. I am simply keeping a diary. If you are starting a diet or exercise program or require medical evaluation or advice, please see your own family physician.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

What a BUNCH of CRAP!

Some days just don't go as planned. They just don't.  Mine didn't today. Woke up with a terrible migraine. Overslept. Didn't get my workout this morning. Forgot my food and snacks. Emergency at work and ran late so missed TKD class. Ate salad at lunch brought into the office. Grabbed the dressing and ate it, THEN realized it WASN'T my usual low fat light dressing so it's TRIPLE the calories and fat. Crap. There's carrot cake in the break room calling my name and I've told it to kiss off.  With all the chaos I haven't gotten all my water in today. NOW I am just getting done with work and I have to SOMEHOW get dinner, homework for 3 kids, baths for 2 kids AND get a workout in between NOW and 10 pm. AHHH!

When days like these happen you have a choice:You can either roll with it and do your best OR bail out, give up and "start again tomorrow".


Heck, it's Thursday already, right? Might as well enjoy the weekend. You deserve it, don't you? You've worked hard all week. Maybe it was a really hard one. And tomorrow you have who knows WHAT to do. Maybe you have a party, luncheon, meeting? Maybe a big presentation to do? Or maybe you have the day off and just want to "relax"? You don't want to stress out about your diet TODAY after every thing else you've had to deal with. Just worry about it Monday. MONDAY is a much better day to get back on track.

Some days you wake up and everything is clicking. These days are AWESOME. You're a healthy eating, exercising machine. You KILLED it today. You were SOOOO good. Even ate that extra serving of green stuff. AND the water. MAN were you good!  You should totally have just a teeny, tiny bite of that cake in the break room. What's-her-name's birthday was today. Don't want to hurt her feelings. Oh and don't forget....you-know-who MADE it and you KNOW if you don't at least try it she'll never let you forget it. One tiny bite won't hurt and besides you burned 500 calories on the treadmill, right?

Some days SUCK. You don't want to even SEE another piece of lettuce. Ugh.....if you have to eat another salad! Or CHICKEN. Grilled chicken is STILL chicken no matter how you spice it, chop it, or try to hide it under that arugula. And yogurt...STILL yogurt no matter how much fruit or granola you dump in there. And egg WHITES. Who eats that? Who even thought to eat that? And then EVERY DAY??? Why can't you just ONE day have a pancake? Or a MUFFIN? Remember those? Yum.....with the crumbly topping. Sigh....SCREW it. You're allowed a CHEAT day once and a while. Aren't you? If you don't let yourself indulge WON'T you just GIVE up anyway? So what's the point? You'll just keep dreaming about that ice cream sundae they keep showing on that commercial until you have it. Better to just get it out of the way now, then you can get going on the diet.

Oh......What's the POINT? You try and try and TRY  and still don't lose weight. No matter how WELL you eat or exercise, the weight STILL won't come off. It's not FAIR. AND it's genetic. AND it's hormones AND it's just how it is for you. AND it's your medicine. AND it's HARD to exercise. You're just not into it. You've never been a person who liked exercise. SOME people do but you're just not one of the lucky ones, right? Besides it's so much EASIER to workout AFTER you lose a little weight first. If ONLY you could ever lose weight THEN you'd be able to work out THEN you'd be ABLE to follow a diet, maybe then.......

 PLUS you're happy aren't you. I mean you have a great life. PLUS you ENJOY eating. What's WRONG with that anyway? It's not like you do DRUGS or SMOKE or DRINK (a lot anyway). I mean YOU'RE a good person. You VOTE, go to CHURCH, take care of your family and ALL that REALLY matters is what's INSIDE. So who cares how much you weigh anyway. You spend WAY too much time obsessing over your diet and weight. You need to think about things that REALLY matter, right? Right???


I've been there. Thought it all. HEARD it all. I KNOW. It's so easy to let yourself quit.   Seems logical at the time. Loving yourself. Being happy where your at......all that stuff.

Problem is:

It is ALL a BUNCH of CRAP you tell yourself that LET'S you DO to YOURSELF what you KNOW is KILLING YOU.

Bottom line. That's what it boils down to. Sometimes loving yourself and being focused on what really matters means saying NO to YOURSELF. What REALLY matters is living a long healthy life. Seeing your kids grow up. Being able to MOVE and BREATHE and LIVE without pain. Maybe SLEEP well without medicine or a machine. Getting off all that medicine you hate taking everyday. Avoiding a heart attack, a stroke, a surgery, and all the terrible crap that is going to happen if you don't do what you know you MUST. STOP listening to the lies you tell yourself.

Being overweight, obese, unhealthy and inactive is NOT OK. It's NOT.

Love yourself enough. Love your family, your kids, your life enough. FIND SOMETHING you love enough to do it. 

And do IT NOW.

Every. Single. Day.

The good ones, the bad ones, the mediocre ones, the awesome ones, the plain old every day ones.


  1. Love your post. Navigating the slippery slope thinking on a bad ( or good) day a critical skill for both loss and maintnence. That cake in the break room does not rule my day any more.

    Hope things get better tomorrow and glad you are looking at the big picture. Keep going ! Karen P

  2. Amen! But isn't that how we think? We try and rationalize our actions as "normal"... But they're not. HEALTH is normal. And we can choose it.


  3. Absolutely! I find that something unexpected happens more often than not, but that's not an excuse to neglect my health. That's life - it'll always be hectic. What I've got to do is stay healthy to get through those stressful/trying times ... the time and effort is always worth it!

  4. Rationalization has killed many a good blogger ;)

    Great post.

  5. Wonderful post!!! Loved every word of it. Hugs!


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